Last night, I went out and had a lot to drink. I went to a rooftop bar in East London and we did bowls and played giant jenga and had drinks then we went to a Karaoke bar and had more drinks.
At maybe 1am when we were sitting in the karaoke bar, I realised I hadn't been that drunk since Sydney or felt so free in a young person way.
I'm not unhappy with my life, but in some ways there is a divide between us as a group (which isn't a bad thing per se). Last night, I caught a small glimpse of how this is happening. Short statement, this is not about my ego or about my life not being what I want or about other people being successful or being unhappy. It's about choices.
The reality of my life is I work a job with a lot of career potential and I have set my career up to be really successful. I'm very aware that in context, I'm incredibly young. I'm very driven, and I have received a lot from my job but I also have had to make sacrifices.
To be the person I am, live the life I am living and be trusted to do what I do, there are a set of expected behaviours. In some way, a set of chosen behaviours which match to an age which is older than me and generally quite conservative. I have accepted these, because of what I want in my life. This, in turn, has meant I have not done a lot of things which I might have done if I'd been working in a bar or still at University, and vice versa, with this job, I've been able to do some really cool stuff.
So back to last night, sitting in the karaoke bar at 1am. I was having fun. In all this expectation and career and 'being an adult', I'd convinced myself that doing careless, stupid, drunk things like this wasn't fun. In a way, to stop feeling bad when that's not the life I can realistically have with the job that I have for multiple reasons that I will not go into.
I'm not regretful of the choices I have made, it's just that, they are choices for my life to be a certain way and I'm ok with that. I think sometimes the choices I've made maybe were too conservative and that's something for me to think about. But I'm also ok with people making different choices. I guess it's just important to be aware that we all make different choices for different reasons.
At maybe 1am when we were sitting in the karaoke bar, I realised I hadn't been that drunk since Sydney or felt so free in a young person way.
I'm not unhappy with my life, but in some ways there is a divide between us as a group (which isn't a bad thing per se). Last night, I caught a small glimpse of how this is happening. Short statement, this is not about my ego or about my life not being what I want or about other people being successful or being unhappy. It's about choices.
The reality of my life is I work a job with a lot of career potential and I have set my career up to be really successful. I'm very aware that in context, I'm incredibly young. I'm very driven, and I have received a lot from my job but I also have had to make sacrifices.
To be the person I am, live the life I am living and be trusted to do what I do, there are a set of expected behaviours. In some way, a set of chosen behaviours which match to an age which is older than me and generally quite conservative. I have accepted these, because of what I want in my life. This, in turn, has meant I have not done a lot of things which I might have done if I'd been working in a bar or still at University, and vice versa, with this job, I've been able to do some really cool stuff.
So back to last night, sitting in the karaoke bar at 1am. I was having fun. In all this expectation and career and 'being an adult', I'd convinced myself that doing careless, stupid, drunk things like this wasn't fun. In a way, to stop feeling bad when that's not the life I can realistically have with the job that I have for multiple reasons that I will not go into.
I'm not regretful of the choices I have made, it's just that, they are choices for my life to be a certain way and I'm ok with that. I think sometimes the choices I've made maybe were too conservative and that's something for me to think about. But I'm also ok with people making different choices. I guess it's just important to be aware that we all make different choices for different reasons.
