O.o

hey

you know what

why does getting creeped on feel bad? Like sometimes someones bein a crepe and it's kinda light hearted or easy to ignore or funny (like if i dumb random shouts something at you they perceive to be a compliment, or some pathetic individual trying to buy you a drink in the most awkward way possible)

but also why are some people incapable of hitting on others / flirting without being a total creep? Like is it our responsibility to explain to them 'this is not how you do it'

anyway.

but today for some reason i just feel really bad. like some guy at my office put his hand on my shoulder that was immediately received by me to be suuuppppeerrr uncomfortable

and like it wasn't super offensive and could be a platonic kinda 'hey bud' shoulder grab

which happens all the time with other people and is cool normally.

but for some reason. i was just like. erghhhh

but you like can't call someone out without seeming like you're overreacting? IDK. anyway luckily madichan was there and could verify creepy vibes for me. like, is having creepy vibes enough to say 'hey man don't be doing that' without sounding like a crazy person? You know like when straight boys don't make their intentions clear because of their fear of rejection... and I don't know how to make them not do those things that can be played off as harmless platonic activities, but like I'm pretty sure they're tryin something. You know??? ANYWAY. feeels bad!!!

but like. why did such a small action feel so bad if it wasn't really like anything? why does it feel so gross??

And it's like easier to ignore the person instead of doing the whole 'hey let me tell you not to do that thing eventhough you didnt really do anything i guess, but still it makes people feel weird like sorry' but also i don't want to be apologetic at all. i just want people to not be creepy so no one has to deal with stuff like this.

update: I think it feels the worse when you're trying to be nice to people (for no reason!) and you trust them to not be creep but then they creep!!
like i don't have time or any sort of capacity for more people in my life but i felt obligated and they turn out to be creep! why


Also another random thing - since i've started following famous people specific to my interest on instagram, i find the platform so entertaining! and i keep liking posts! all of them. like yes, this is all content that i enjoy all the time! wow internet.

Wanted to update you guys on a great new development in my life

In my school,

I have slowly created this reputation of myself that I like will eat anyone's leftovers. I usually bring home all the potluck food to save money and have delicious perogies as lunch for the next 3 days (i literally bring extra containers to school...)

But now all this has paid off.
I have had 3 people who made too much food at home, physically bring me a meal to class. Like they didn't bring it to school to eat and give me leftovers, they brought it from home to specifically give to me like im a dogg. It was like "hey Ru, I made too much food last Saturday so I brought some for you here you go."

So I've had homemade delicious chicken stroganoff, beef curry and a chicken pot pie. It's all happen in the last week. I am very excited for what the future holds and hope that this will continue.

That's all.

Also this is one of my new favourite animals:
The Noble Sea TOAD

It has feet. and walks since it lives at the bottom of the ocean.