The World

So as I sit here listening to the instramental remix of Feathers by Nujabes, I'm in a mood that I feel fairly often, but haven't felt in a particular while.

This is a song, one of untold millions on it, and for whatever reason it appeals to my soul or sense of individuality. I feel sort of "connected" to people, and like it's the sort of song that the sort of person I want to be would listen to on the regular. It makes me feel more a part of MY people, my age group, the digital generation, the soulful stoners and never-ending partygoers of this world.

And it makes me sombre at the same time. In making me feel connected, it reinforces how disconnected and identityless I often feel. This particular remix came out four years ago, and while a good song on its own, I'm sure there are far more interesting and highly regarded ones from the genre or scene that it originated from. And here I am, listening to it four years later, only after hearing it through a computer game video, only clawing at the surface of what is likely an incredibly fascinating musical  world in its  own right. Then I go on the tangent to think about how this song is part of an infinitely deep subculture, which likely has its own celebrities, villains, conflicts, tales and triumphs, defeats and despairs. Nujabes died that same year at the age of 36, and it fills with romantic sorrow to think of the particular impact that such a death would've had on his admirers and fans at the time. Here is a man, who has had his own life, was probably telling his own story, had his own outlook on the world based on his experiences, and respected by members of his cultural tribe.

Sometimes I think that I should do something like that, and be part of my own part of the world. I listen to soothing female backing tracks on dubstep songs, and I think that these are young girls who at some point in their life where in the recording studio to document their voice so that others may appreciate some of the same emotions they appreciate while listening to this type of music.
Or perhaps I should consume more of the subcultures that interest me, and weave my own story being identified with those groups, being intrinsically tied with the fate of these worlds.

Then to think of my physical world - take Sydney. This is our current home, and for better or for worse, our lives are currently bound to its ebb and flow. And that's fine, because there are an infinite number of tales that can be told on this one corner of the planet. But this then tells us that on every corner in every city on the planet an equal amount of stories can be told, with the conflicts and resolutions of people like us around the world being uniquely different and wholly the same simultaneously. It doesn't matter if it's Sydney or Tallin or Vladivostok or Cincinnati or Medellin, every world is perfectly full yet utterly lacking.

The world is so vast, and so small.