Tuesday, March 29, 2011

A rant about life, death, depression, dimensions, teleportation, beleiving in ghosts, atheism and religion.

So yeah, I was thinking about life and other miscellaneous and I came to the depressing conclusion once more that once you die everything ends. Consciousness ends along with the ability to perceive anything. Effectively, everything ends. Our brains stop and along with that so does consciousness, we won't have any recollection of life.
I think that's why religion is so popular, or was. People were given hope of something beyond death, of heaven. A way to remember. I'm sure we all have our own personal views on religion so I'll leave mine aside.
I'd like to believe in ghosts... I mean, at least that gives me some hope for what's to come after death. I have alot of reasons to believe in them aswell. As scientifically invalid as they are.
Speaking of atheism and ghosts, so many people these days identify themselves as being atheists, I'm fairly certain aswell that these people will soon outweigh those who consider themselves some form of theist in third world countries (Maybe not America)
though most of these people devoutly believe in ghosts or the supernatural... it's as though people really believe that believing in a deity is extraordinarily more absurd than believing in the supernatural, so much so that they grace the supernatural with the recognition of their cynical minds. I don't believe in the supernatural though (As much as I'd love to), also if you were wondering, I'm agnostic.
Other than that though I don't really have beef with atheists. It's an improvement on the previous theist-based society, where everyone knew eachother and went to church on sundays to pray for their side to win the war.
That brings me to teleportation, I remember, vaguely but yes I remember on New Years Eve Josh posing the question "What comes after teleportation" (with the sub-context of, nothing does, the universe is limited ooooooh, mind blown) or something like that... it's a very loose quote. On the night I was feeling too happy to say anything about it aside from feigning a few "AMG"s and here's what I really have to say about it. It's teleportation may not necessarily mean that the universe is limited. It means that better forms of transportation, if that's what you were using teleportation as are merely inconceivable. We simply aren't able to fathom them, their creation, their purpose or their reason. Our universe and existence may not be constricted simply to what we can comprehend, or even perceive.

Ultimately, all of these thoughts took a toll on me, I wasn't necessarily a happy chappy.
I don't want it to end. I don't want to forget and stop existing. That's why i think to myself, "If this is it, if this is all there is to existence then I'll live it out, I'll live it my way." which has kept me going.
Also I've been thinking about dimensions, planes of existence, the unknown and the unfathomable. "Perhaps", I think to myself. "Perhaps, somewhere, at some point in the ninth dimension there's a plane of existence where consciousness continues. Where existence is blurred and perverted from the 4 dimensional one that we know and live so that I may remember" that's what makes me happy right now, it's scientifically valid, to an extent and it's what I now believe in... Ofcourse a belief that dictates ones life is not something to take lightly... I'll need time, a lifetime to consider it.

Here's a song. It's amazing.

Yes, I do realize how conceited this whole rant is. Only being concerned for my own continued existence in this universe.

6 comments:

Șмž said...

very nice.
but I just want to say, creation comes after teleportation. like, creating something out of nothing. idk

the only conceited point you make imho is the assumption that consciousness reaches beyond our physical selves. (or so I interpret it after midnight with minimal sleep)
also, if it takes you a lifetime to ponder such a thing as belief, then you'd be wasting your time because by the time you become wise enough you will be dead

...so, yeah.

JD said...

I think in the context that he was using teleportation he was using it as an example of the limits of conceivable travel...

Yeah, my only hope is that consciousness does in fact reach beyond our physical selves. If not then everything is sorely depressing.

That's exactly the kind of point I was making :)
What I would have said, were I trying to outline what I, in reality am going to do concerning my own belief I would've had said something loosely among the lines of "Pondering my own belief as I live, living as though my belief at each moment is correct only after serious consideration of the validity of my current beliefs based on facts and scientific theory."
Though, I probably would have said something that made more sense.
Thanks for taking the time to read through it all though, I had posted it assuming noone would.

Anonymous said...

Hey, random anon here, but you might be able to guess who it is.

I've also been going through bouts of despair, listlessness and so probably depression (It was prolonged, more than just feeling shitty). I've had High Violet on repeat for too long :/

But yeah these are hard thoughts, mortality is for obvious reasons the scariest fucking thing ever. I'm just relieved that it's only sometimes it strikes me, if I think about it abstractly it doesn't bother me too much, but occasionally I feel it, and it's the shitest thing.

I'm glad that you posted them, the worst part about these thoughts (and other depressing ones) are that you (or it's maybe just me) feel like there's no real reason to bring them up if they just serve to confuse and sadden.

I'm an atheist, in that I don't think it's valid to assume a god, and even less valid to act according to rules claiming there is one, but I would really like to believe in an afterlife though it would feel hollow if I forced myself. So I always have a problem confronting people with religion and, if I may hazard, other forms of self-deception which brings happiness even if it's irrational and false. It's the Brave New World problem I always struggle with, is happiness the ultimate goal always? Does that mean if we all drip feed on morphine (or soma) then we have achieved the best possible outcome?

I can't really say I have much of an answer, only that I guess finality means that things are real and matter, that things should be treated as important. But also it means that things should be done for their own sake, do what you like and what is good, not for some supernatural higher purpose but for your own enjoyment and a better world.

I have similar funnels of dissatisfaction when I start thinking of experience, interpretation, time, solipsism (that you can only view the world through your mind), equivalence, and society. But not when I'm thinking in abstract, but when thoughts buzz in my head constantly "that thing which just happened, doesn't exist anymore and never will again" and "I can only ever view the world from my head, the most extreme emotions I've seen others experience have to be recreated by me to feel them, so I may be feeling things completely wrong".

See I'm afraid to go on because my thoughts go deeper and more disturbing than that sometimes. Also I may just possibly be rambling (ughh 2.a.m.)

But here's the thing which I have to rely on a bit. Ultimately things haven't changed, you can't think the world horrible, or beautiful, or meaningless or ordered. The universe and life it's all those things, and while you may shift your opinions, views and moods, the world still continues regardless, work still gets done, trees are still fun to climb, people still laugh and feud.

That's not to say "just ignore it", the only thing I find worse than a depressing truth is a nagging feeling that I'm actively trying to be ignorant of one, forcing myself to ignore it.

Haha, anyway I have no idea if anyone will ever make it this far (can't blame them) but it feels cathartic writing this anyway.

Anyway I hope you feel better, I think I've gotten out of my rut (though I've said that to myself a few times) but we'll see when I have to get up tomorrow with little sleep.

Anonymous said...

Hey, random anon here, but you might be able to guess who it is.

I've also been going through bouts of despair, listlessness and so probably depression (It was prolonged, more than just feeling shitty). I've had High Violet on repeat for too long :/

But yeah these are hard thoughts, mortality is for obvious reasons the scariest fucking thing ever. I'm just relieved that it's only sometimes it strikes me, if I think about it abstractly it doesn't bother me too much, but occasionally I feel it, and it's the shitest thing.

I'm glad that you posted them, the worst part about these thoughts (and other depressing ones) are that you (or it's maybe just me) feel like there's no real reason to bring them up if they just serve to confuse and sadden.

I'm an atheist, in that I don't think it's valid to assume a god, and even less valid to act according to rules claiming there is one, but I would really like to believe in an afterlife though it would feel hollow if I forced myself. So I always have a problem confronting people with religion and, if I may hazard, other forms of self-deception which brings happiness even if it's irrational and false. It's the Brave New World problem I always struggle with, is happiness the ultimate goal always? Does that mean if we all drip feed on morphine (or soma) then we have achieved the best possible outcome?

I can't really say I have much of an answer, only that I guess finality means that things are real and matter, that things should be treated as important. But also it means that things should be done for their own sake, do what you like and what is good, not for some supernatural higher purpose but for your own enjoyment and a better world.

I have similar funnels of dissatisfaction when I start thinking of experience, interpretation, time, solipsism (that you can only view the world through your mind), equivalence, and society. But not when I'm thinking in abstract, but when thoughts buzz in my head constantly "that thing which just happened, doesn't exist anymore and never will again" and "I can only ever view the world from my head, the most extreme emotions I've seen others experience have to be recreated by me to feel them, so I may be feeling things completely wrong".

See I'm afraid to go on because my thoughts go deeper and more disturbing than that sometimes. Also I may just possibly be rambling (ughh 2.a.m.)

But here's the thing which I have to rely on a bit. Ultimately things haven't changed, you can't think the world horrible, or beautiful, or meaningless or ordered. The universe and life it's all those things, and while you may shift your opinions, views and moods, the world still continues regardless, work still gets done, trees are still fun to climb, people still laugh and feud.

That's not to say "just ignore it", the only thing I find worse than a depressing truth is a nagging feeling that I'm actively trying to be ignorant of one, forcing myself to ignore it.

Haha, anyway I have no idea if anyone will ever make it this far (can't blame them) but it feels cathartic writing this anyway.

Anyway I hope you feel better, I think I've gotten out of my rut (though I've said that to myself a few times) but we'll see when I have to get up tomorrow with little sleep.

Always number one said...

woah anon, that was a long comment
[pointless comment is pointless]

Urahara said...

nah, joel, you're silly. when we die as good people, we go to soul society. you of all people should know that :P