I am leaving, i am leaving, but the fire still remains

so
i decided that i would not go out today cos i am going to be out the whole day tomoz and i needed today to finish by bio work.
i gave ru $20 to buy something nice for me at supanova.
im on this blog that noone's on atm cos everyone's out. I've made some lunch and poured myself a glass of orange juice.
starin at my clock
starting to read nabari no ou
waiting for best dance crew to come on in about 4 hours
and avatar to come on in 7.
yay my life is so interesting.
are you still reading this?
sometimes, everybody seems so terribly sad. and i keep thinking that we should do whatever we can to make it better.
oh and im doing some soul searching atm
speaking of which maybe i should return everyone's soul
anyway, i keep thinking, what if, even doing anything we can is not enough.
then i get sick of it and i start over analysing
like, maybe if we cant make it better, than its not our fault
but it is. but i cant fix something, that i dont think is broke
or worse,
i'll fix it in a place i think is broke but leave out what's really broken
then it just makes it worse
im a terribly happy person
or maybe im a happily terrible person.
and i've stopped caring alot more than i used to. or im caring more
i used to have no guilt. now i do. but i used to really care what people think
now i care less (dont mean i dont care at all)
cos i cant change all that's happened, and everything i do is because,
im just like that.
its just a result of me being that kiind of a person.
and i cant change that. so i'll do things i regret. but i wont regret it that much
because no matter how i look at it, i'll always be like that and even if i went back through time,
i'll still redo things i dont want to do
because im
just
like
that.
(are you still reading this?)